Act Two: Scene One “Fish’s Cheese Ballad Part I”

“A Cheese to Call My Own”
(Fish’s Cheese Ballad – Part I)

(Soft piano intro, wistful and yearning. Fish steps forward, clutching a small wheel of cheese like it holds the secrets of the universe.)

FISH:
(gently, almost whispering)
I’ve wandered streets, I’be crossed the nights,
Fru alleys dim and city lights…
Searching, sniffing, dreaming wide—
A cheese to keep right by my side.

(Music swells, a longing violin joins in.)

FISH:
(growing bolder, heart swelling)
Oh, brie so creamy, gouda bold,
A tale of love that’s softly told.
Blue veined mysteries, sharp and bright,
Each bite a spark, a golden light!

(A gentle waltz rhythm begins, as if he’s dancing with the cheese.)

FISH:
(twirling, arms outstretched to the heavens)
Parmesan whispers, aged just right,
A sliver stolen in the night.
Camembert’s hush, a fleeting dream,
But oh, the melt, the perfect gleam!

(Pause. The music quiets—just a soft plucking of strings. Fish clutches the cheese closer, voice breaking with emotion.)

FISH:
But could there be… a cheese for me?
A wheel, a wedge, a bite, a key…
To all I’ve longed for, all I’ve known…
A cheese to truly call my own?

(A hush falls. Then—suddenly—the music swells into a triumphant, sweeping finale!)

FISH:
(powerful, victorious!)
Yes! A cheese that’s mine, a love so true!
A perfect rind, a golden hue!
From Stilton deep to cheddar bright—
My heart, my soul, my guiding light!

(Final note held, orchestra swells. Fish lifts the cheese high above his head, bathed in a spotlight. The crowd goes wild! Fish scurries off into the nearby cheese café )