Hi everyone. This is Gourdon, Secretary of Agriculture under President Fibbs. Like all of you, I am very sad about the passing of our great leader, yet at the same time am glad to have been a friend to him, Milo, and Wimbley. They taught me a lot of great values about friendship, such as looking beyond someone’s appearance and judging him or her instead on his or her character, the importance of staying in touch with the ones you care about, to share your gifts with the world, and most importantly, to always try to make the world a better place. I hope that I can live up to these values and make Fibbs proud as I travel throughout America doing the job he gave me.

In doing that traveling, I have come across a particular slogan that bugs me a little bit. I’m sure you may have heard of it too; it is “Make America Great Again.” The problem I have with this is that it seems to indicate that America is not currently great, that it is lacking something that needs to be rediscovered to return it to some standard of glory some believe it is lacking. I don’t think that at all, and I believe that America is great can easily be proven in the life of our recently Heaven bound, but still serving as our earthly, president.

Fibbs, like all Americans, came into this life born into a land of freedom where anything could be possible. Of course, it would require a lot of work on his part, but the opportunity was there. He was able to take advantage of the guaranteed education system afforded to all in America, and then armed with that education, go out into the world and seek to make something of himself.

We can all agree Fibs did just that. Sure he may have bounced around from job to job — meteorologist, chef, small business owner (check out a Fibb’s Frostee Freeze & Donuts near you), clothing model for A Hat for My Rat, adventurer, recording artist — but like all Americans he had the opportunity to pursue his dreams. There was no caste system or government limiting his options.

That same government that did not limit his options did however cause him some trouble at times, especially when it came to running on the wrong side of the law. And while it did lead to some time in the slammer for some of his more egregious offenses, such as throwing a juicy pickle on a trolley in Rhode Island or having a bite of someone’s hamburger in Oklahoma, the fact that America is a nation of laws is a good thing. These laws help produce an orderly society where people not have to focus all their energy on merely surviving, but could use it instead to build themselves and their communities up.

While some of Fibbs’ run-ins with the law produced some funny moments in hindsight, they also prove another point why I think America is still great: second chances. As much as society enjoys seeing someone fall, equally appealing and even more heartwarming are stories of redemptions. America has always been known for rooting for the underdog, and no one is more of an underdog than someone who has hit rock bottom. America allows people to pick themselves up after they fall and rise back up if they are willing to work within the system and truly hope to better themselves. Fibbs proved this once again. Who would have thought that prisoner 14 could rise up and be president? But he did!

Fibbs assumption of the office of president did wonders (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) for the country, but even greater than the legislation passed, charities helped, and relationships between countries mended was the force of unity he brought to this world, most noticeable in the Marty Mouse House Minions Facebook page. Here Fibbs and his brothers Milo and Wimbley brought so much joy to people and rats of all types. Young or old, blue or white collar, Democrat or Republican (but mostly Donutcrat), people regardless of gender, race, religion, orientation, or home country were all brought together. They say America is the great melting pot of the world, and I believe Fibbs showed that this is still true.

I heard it said in my travels that the measure of one’s life is not in the number of days lived, but in the ways those days were spent. In this sense, though we all wish Fibbs had more days with us here on Earth, we can’t deny the effect of his days in proving America is truly still great. His life showed that Americans today, just like in the past, have many opportunities available to them, and when combined with hard work, can lead to a truly blessed life, regardless of who you are at birth. Fibbs, thanks for the laughs, inspiration, and reassurance that this country is still great and that there are still great people in it and around the world. Your fans and minions miss you but will never forget you or the important lessons you and your brothers taught us.

Pleased to serve as your Secretary of Agriculture,

Gourdon